Hi my name is…. Sex please?

Everyone who’s been on Tinder has had at least one conversation with a guy where he tries to get sexual before you’ve even met. Now this could be in a number of ways:

1) Easing sex into the conversation

You’ve been talking for a little while, a couple of days, a week, but you still haven’t met up. Your chat hasn’t been continuous it’s been off and on. You’re barely getting to know each other, scratching the surface then… He asks for your number, or better yet, your snapchat. At this point, you may simply say no to the number as you don’t want any random Tinderite possessing it, as for snapchat it may be a way to check out if the guy is who he says he is, so maybe you agree to it. I did not. I wanted to see what his intentions were first. I like a dick pic as much as the next guy, but not from a total stranger… Or maybe I just don’t like dick pics that I don’t find attractive lol 

Side note: Me and my childhood friend Addie used to get drunk, go out and tell guys to “show us your willys.” The first time we did it we were just messing around. We had no idea guys would actually do it. That being said, the guys were drunk too. We’d look at it and applaud and that was that. They didn’t expect anything more, which is good because we certainly weren’t doing anything but looking. We did this on chat roulette too, but sober. We thought, no sober guy is gonna whip out his dick and show two girls he’s never met before… Low and behold the number of dicks we saw that night.

Okay well that little side note clears something up. I like looking at dicks πŸ™ˆ I think they’re cool and some are super attractive. Others I wish I had never seen… Oh my God am I a penis snob? 

Let’s move on…

2) Masking sex talk through humour

For me this might be the worst one. If you’re gonna be that guy the one who brings up sex and says inappropriate things then can you at least just own it? When I call you out on it don’t say you were joking. In fact don’t add an lol or haha to what you’re saying either. We both know if I said yes to your proposal or continued with the dirty talk, you wouldn’t have admitted it was a joke.

3) Straight up says he wants to dick you (“Dick you” πŸ˜‚ this was autocorrect as I meant “fuck you,” but I liked the sound of it)

We all know how this goes… Sometimes the guy has the decency to say “hello”and if we’re really lucky “how’s it going?” before he says some version of the following:

Pictures are compliments of the hot one.

I really shouldn’t entertain him like this lol

4) The classic dick pic 

This is for the guy you’ve actually added to whatsapp for whatever reason. Maybe he’s shown he’s got some good guy qualities, maybe you’re about to delete tinder for the millionth time so you give out your number to a few potentials beforehand. Whatever the reason he’s on whatsapp which means he can send you pictures now.

Why do guys think it’s appropriate to send dick pics to women they barely know? Do they think their dicks are that magnificent that upon seeing it we’ll think damn I’ve got to try that dick! Noo… We’re more likey to think something along the lines of sigh why did he have to ruin it?

*sorry guys I’ve got no dick pics to share with you, my sincerest apologises*

-Love, Autumn x

16 comments

  1. indiangirldating · June 21

    LOL I feel such a kinship with you EXCEPT on the dick pics/dick looking. I don’t find them attractive at all. If I get a dick pic, my reaction is always “…..and?” hahah

    Liked by 2 people

    • Haha I’ve seen some really attractive ones I can’t lie. Mr X has the most perfect looking dick I’ve ever seen in my life πŸ™ˆ but yeah there are a lot that I see and I’m like…Whyyy lol

      Liked by 1 person

  2. L. Rorschach · June 21

    You know I can relate to this! *sigh*

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Sidharth · June 22

    Lol I truly enjoyed, the screenshots were like the icing on the cake ! It’s time we all realize that females aren’t sex tools & that females should be respected in the society , thanks for sharing such a funny yet insightful post ! According to your convenience please do read some of my writings would love to know what you think about them πŸ™‚

    Liked by 2 people

  4. pratseek · June 22

    Not owning your sexual desire is No 1 complain from women about modern man..

    Liked by 1 person

  5. pratseek · June 23

    well you yourself complain about it in point No 2..

    Like

  6. Doesn’t mean it’s the number one complaint lol I think women have a lot more to complain about than that

    Like

  7. CAHL7 · July 3

    This is hilarious. I love that guys literally think we’re all over here like “Yum! Dicks!” Basically, we’re sending these pics to friends making fun of the curve of your dick! πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ‘πŸΌπŸ˜¬

    Liked by 2 people

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